Friday

Unexpectedly you come in,
one look towards me and then a look to the floor.
Clearing my throat,
but still feeling annoyed.

It wasn't that long ago,
five months to be exact.
Bets going on to see how long you'd last.

"Sorry for being a Douche."

I'm thinking to myself,
let this end,
pray I don't lose myself.

"Ok"

You apologize but that's all I can say,
I let you walk out the door,
maybe feeling confused,
maybe even frustrated.

It wasn't that long ago that you cut me off,
It wasn't that long ago that you broke my heart.
but long enough for me to come to terms that you no longer want me in your life.

I can't jump for joy because you apologized,
but I will jump for joy because finally,
after all this time;
you realized you were a ass for what you did.

Letting you in my life would be a mistake,
and letting you slip away is also a curse.

Drunk on Me, Sober on You

It was a normal night,
you were miles away,
but over the phone I could feel you whispering in my ear.

We try to keep our conversations "every-day" topic,
but there's always one night where we can't hold back.
You belong to her and I belong to him.

Your voice changed,
stuttering on your words,
then your voice sang a tune.

"I wish I could lay down beside you
When the day is done
And wake up to your face against the morning sun
But like everything I've ever known
You disappear one day
So I spend my whole life hiding my heart away"
(Adele)

This is a good song,
you keeping whispering,
singing;
I love your voice.

You were no longer yourself,
drinking a remedy to numb your heart.
You spoke the truth.

Deep down I knew what you wanted to say,
I wanted to hear you say it,
"i love you"

"This song makes me think of you," he said.
He misses me,
but he wont say it;
just like I won't say it.

I smiled at the sound of his voice,
I didn't care if his words were drunk.
It was until the end of the song when things changed.

He cleared his throat,
and told me goodnight.
"I want you to take the sober me."

It then hit me,
this is what it'll always be,
our feelings there,
but never moving.

I tell him goodnight,
trying my best not to let the tears slide.

A Party for Him

I watched her as she hugged him,
he looked at her with a sincere look,
holding her hand in his,
she smiled and laughed.
They had a world, a language, and actions nobody could decode.

I tried my best to not watch them,
but as they sat there laughing; it reminded me of something.
She was never this way with me; not even now.
He said hi to his friends and family, but never really broke their conversation.
It was like he didn't want to let her go.

I don't think I could let her go.
It felt like they spent the whole night talking to each other,
but really its been twenty minutes.
Sadly it's been killing me inside.

So as I watch her walk away smiling at him,
sliding her hair behind her ear; she walks towards me.
She walks slowly losing that glow she had three seconds ago,
sliding her hand across my back to hold me.
I looked into her eyes,
but all I could see was him.

She belonged to me,
but her heart belonged to him.

Abandoned

All she wanted was her mother to tell her she loved her,
instead her mother pushed her out the door.
She watched other mothers walk their children to the school bus,
giving kisses and hugs.

She sat there thinking what happened,
how did it get to this?
Her father never comes home anymore,
stays at work, the bar,
just walks out the door.

She no longer has the happy home,
no more kisses goodnight,
and no more sunday breakfasts.

So as she sitting there,
a lady; she will now call mom,
takes her hand,
leads her to her car.

She don't scream or fight,
but takes one last look at her home,
climbs in the car.
"I love you mommy and daddy."

She is now gone,
celebrating her 7th birthday,
with a lady she now calls mom.

Remembering You

"Scoot over!"
You climbed in my bed,
stared up at my ceiling,
"Wake Up!"

You played with my hair,
I yelled at you but still you laid next to me.
......

Certain days I wish this could be us again,
instead you wanted out,
wanted more;
but I declined.

I see you every now and then
wish I could run up to you and hug you.
Something about you has changed,
you lost yourself in your own mess of chaos.

I run past your house and remember spending nights,
dinners, and playing games at your house.
Sitting on your couch
laying my legs on yours.

We smiled and laughed at everyone,
everyone questioned our relationship,
I was your friend and you were mine.
Until you changed your mind.

I think of our last conversation
and start to cry.
I wonder everyday why you gave me up,
I wouldn't have done that to you.

I miss you everyday,
but someday I'll get over this.
Someday.